You avert your eyes to the CREST SHRINE, approaching it and kneeling down to examine it. You make sure each candles fuse cord is ALL THE SAME LENGTHS. Once you make sure everything is perfect, you burn all of them at the same time, kneeling down, head to the floor CHANTING at photos of JOSEPH C. MUHLER, HARRY DAY, AND WILLIAM H. Repeating: "Crest... Crest... Crest..."
This is your daily ritual.
TOOTHPASTE as a whole has a delectable texture and taste to you, so much that you surround yourself in a PLETHORA OF TOOTHPASTE RELATED PRODUCTS, as if you feel more connected with yourself and your true purpose in life whenever you feel, or simply even see those sweet fluoride-filled tubes. Ahh... what you'd give to meet the glorious men who made your favorite brandings of toothpaste: CREST AND COLGATE. The way the paste melts in your mouth as it lands on your tongue, the material of the tube that makes it easy to squeeze, the way it slithers down your esophagus when you finally gulp down... It sparks a new sense of EUPHORIA in you... one more indescribable than the beaming expression you wear as you chew and crunch into the mixture. It's for this reason that you think of Joseph, Harry, Willy, and William as DEITIES ABOVE ALL ELSE. Who could've made such perfect creations if it isn't Gods who did? These are the questions you ask, and your conclusion is that they are LEGENDS, and will remain legends. There's no debating that.